Vincent Valeri

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In this episode of The Family Wealth Edge, Vincent Valeri and Kristen Heaney explore how the most powerful lessons about family wealth often come not from formal sit-downs, but from everyday teachable moments. A story about Vincent’s eight-year-old son and a patch of backyard weeds sparks a deeper reflection on work ethic, entitlement, and how parents can model responsibility—one small moment at a time. Together, they unpack how families can turn ordinary experiences into lifelong lessons about values, ownership, and the meaning of wealth beyond money.

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Takeaways

Teachable moments matter more than “big talks.” Small, everyday situations create lasting lessons about values and money.

Vincent’s story: His son’s comment—“Just pay someone to fix it”—prompted a realization about modeling hard work and responsibility.

Parenting with intention: Kids learn more from what parents do than what they say.

Work builds character. Hands-on experiences like mowing lawns or helping with family chores teach discipline and pride in effort.

Wealth lessons mirror life lessons. Responsibility, ownership, and stewardship should be taught the same way as good manners or empathy—early and often.

Avoid the “one big talk.” Like healthy sexuality or ethics, financial and value-based education should be continuous and natural.

Balance comfort and challenge. It’s tempting to outsource or make things easy—but sometimes the harder route teaches the richer lesson.

Consequences teach too. Both positive (pride, independence) and negative (frustration, fatigue) outcomes are part of real growth.

Wealth values require practice. Families must repeatedly model, discuss, and revisit what money means and how it’s used.

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Vincent Valeri: Welcome back to the Family Wealth Edge. Kristen, how are you doing?

‍Kristen Heaney: I’m great, how are you?

‍Vincent Valeri: I'm doing wonderful on a rainy day up here in southern Ontario. There’s a theme that the weather up here is probably not as nice as yours down in southern Florida.

‍Kristen Heaney: Well, we all choose where to live, Vincent, but I, as you know, lived in Detroit for half of my life. I know springtime is a little rainy and comes with a lot of work associated with cleanup.

‍Vincent Valeri: Yes. It’s amazing how fast the seasons change, which reminds me of something that happened the other day. My eight-year-old son and I were out in the backyard just after the landscapers had come. A part of the yard wasn’t cut well—there were weeds—and I muttered some choice words. My son said, “We’ll just call them back. We’ll just pay them more.” That stopped me in my tracks. I realized I wasn’t living my values strongly enough with him about hard work and taking responsibility. So I fired the landscapers, bought a lawnmower and a weed whacker, and now Leo and I will be cutting the grass together every weekend. He sees me on the computer or traveling, but I wanted him to see a different kind of work, too. Message received.

‍Kristen Heaney: You’re probably both going to regret that when you’re sweating behind the mower this summer—but it’s also superhero-dad stuff: noticing the lesson hidden in an ordinary moment. What about his response told you a value was being missed?

‍Vincent Valeri: Without sounding dramatic, I pictured him at 25 saying, “Something broke? Just replace it,” instead of “take care of what you have.” I’ve noticed a pattern—probably from our parenting—where a toy breaks or something’s left out and there’s an expectation someone else will fix it. The backyard moment triggered me to nip that in the bud. And that ties to something you talk about a lot: teachable moments.

‍Kristen Heaney: Totally. It’s like the “one big talk” about healthy sexuality—most experts now say that’s not ideal. Better to have a hundred small conversations as things come up. Wealth values are the same. Kudos to you for catching this one. Yard work is a classic place to show work ethic. In our house, Ryan (my husband) had the kids cleaning pools and mowing lawns early. People notice—our youngest said the orthodontist sees him mowing and can’t believe it. It’s rare now. You’re going against the tide, which is a good thing.

‍Vincent Valeri: I grew up around factories—long hours, hands dirty—so it’s not foreign to me. But I realized I’d taken that element away from my kids. I’m grateful for the reset. Maybe we’ll do a follow-up on how the first day goes.

‍Kristen Heaney: Give it ten years! Joking—but honestly, that’s why I credit Ryan. I’m more likely to cave to the complaining; he holds the line because the lesson is worth it. When you can outsource, it’s hard to choose not to. You can’t say yes to convenience every time.

‍Vincent Valeri: Exactly. I was coaching a family this morning about positive and negative consequences. They were surprised by the idea of positive consequences. With Leo, the negative was the initial grumbling—“I’ve never seen you cut the grass!”—and the positive will be pride, work ethic, and seeing the result of your effort.

‍Kristen Heaney: Sometimes the easy path (“I’ll call the crew back”) isn’t the path to the values you want. Choosing the harder route can be the real teacher.‍

Vincent Valeri: Well said. To summarize:—

‍Teachable moments: embrace them; don’t wait for the one “big” conversation.

‍Micro-conversations: many small, natural talks beat one formal lecture.

‍Consequences: both negative and positive outcomes teach.

‍Practice: values need repetition to stick.Thanks for listening. We’ll see you next time on The Family Wealth Edge.

‍Kristen Heaney: See you soon.